Monkey's Magical Treehouse of Awesomeness

[Lemon Cheesecake]

Monkey - it's a good thing (not a weakness) to get professional help because they can give you tools to calm yourself when you feel the anxiety coming on or see you through the bouts of anxiety plus give you steps to take to take to keep it from getting overwhelming. Sometimes you have to just have to take steps regardless of how you feel. Are you close in your relationship with your sister (or friend or relative) that she can help you through the panic, that you can text "help"? You are not alone, many - even on the Windlyn site - are going through or have gone through what you are. Don't despair!

[Kyndreth]

taking steps to prevent overwhelm is haaaaard.

Anyways, you have my number now Monkey, don't be afraid to call! Or at least text. Texting is good, then I can let you know if I'm available for a call.

[MonkeyGirl18]

tbh, I probably wouldn't call

1. I don't call numbers from outside my state because of risk of long-distance charge. Apparently, I got charged once when I took a call from another state. Or made a call to a phone from another state. I think my friend had apparently somehow got a number that isn't from my state, but from another and my dad said it charged for it.

2. I probably wouldn't say anything because I'm super reserved. I talk a lot here, yeah, but in real life, you have to really go out of your way to get me to say one word.

[Kyndreth]

Eh, I'm okay with that. With anxiety, talking to strangers over a phone can be hard.

What? That's odd, I thought it only mattered if it was outside a country. Man, I might be doing this thing wrong then.

Ehhh, fine by me. I can chatter on about nothing once you get me going.

Well, there's always something like discord I spose.

[MonkeyGirl18]

I might be wrong about that.

Plus, this was like 5 years ago when my dad told me this, so either it is no longer an issue or I'm remembering things wrong.


But yeah, I was about to say something like skype or discord would probably be better, at least for now.

I'm not on my own phone plan, so really, it charged my dad. I'm planning on buying my own plan soon anyway so if I get charged long distance, it'll be out of my own pocket.


I've "talked" to strangers over skype before. " " because I didn't really talk, lol.

[Lemon Cheesecake]

well, sometimes "typing" stuff out helps you resolve it in your mind too.

Hope tomorrow is a better day for you! You have people that care Monkey!

[murmurlade]

Whenever I'm super stressed and scared I usually talk to my friend through Hangouts.
She usually advises me, cheers me up, and it's mostly me listening to her speak. It's extremely comforting and helps me forget and calm down, especially when she goes off on tangents and makes me laugh.

Typing is another alternative.. to a friend or to yourself.
Just y'know, don't deal with it all by yourself.
Good luck Monkey. You can pull through.

Certain states and countries make the caller and receiver split fees during a phone call or roaming, whatever.

[Kyndreth]

I might be wrong about that.

Plus, this was like 5 years ago when my dad told me this, so either it is no longer an issue or I'm remembering things wrong.


But yeah, I was about to say something like skype or discord would probably be better, at least for now.

I'm not on my own phone plan, so really, it charged my dad. I'm planning on buying my own plan soon anyway so if I get charged long distance, it'll be out of my own pocket.


I've "talked" to strangers over skype before. " " because I didn't really talk, lol.

Ahhh, it seems to depend on phone plans, so idk. You're probably right. Yeesh, I may have been racking up a phone bill all unknowingly...

Okie dokie I can send you my discord info then.

Mhm, I seee. Yeah, making relatives pay can be troublesome.

XD I'm not so much of a chatterbox in skype and such. I'll sing, but I really do prefer to type.

[MonkeyGirl18]

It's not me who made him.

He was the one to give me a phone and number.
It used to be my older sister's number before she got her own plan.

My younger sister, bassy, just got her own phone and plan andI plan to do the same within the next week or two.

I'd rather bills come directly to me than to try to remember to ask my dad how much I owe him because he's not going to tell me when the bill comes in even though I never know when it comes. I'm always gone when the mail gets to the house.


Sometimes, I can talk easy with strangers..... But that really depends on how I feel around them, lol. Though, a lot of the times this happens is irl.

[Kyndreth]

I wasn't saying you're forcing him, just that when you're in a situation where someone else has to pay, it can be a bit stressful.

My game plan for communication with strangers:

• Don't make eye contact...
• Nonono you made eye contact, look away!
• They're looking at you! Eye contact again! Don't run away don't run away!
• Smile! Break eye contact!
• You have to say something? They said something to you? Check, no one else? Ohhh uhh... hurry say something!
• Something something, nice weather? Glance at hallway. Glance at the ceiling. You're indoors you foool!
• Have I said enough yet? Say something! Work brain work!
• Did I say too much? I think I said too much. Moooouuuth stoooop!
• Laugh nervously, smile awkwardly.
• Run awaaaaaayyyy!

The life of Kyun-chan.
Aka: Can I run away now?

[galled]

So sorry you have a difficult relationship with your dad and that it causes you so much stress. I think you have to keep in mind that as unfathomable as he may seem to you, he does love you and I bet he's one of your biggest supporters and wants to succeed. If you keep that in mind, perhaps it'll be easier talking to him.

Communication skills are critical to life. I think most relationships are at the very core based on mutual benevolence (although some people want to stay friendly to malevolent people for other reasons). It's the communication lines that inhibit parties from realizing/benefiting from that core basis.

What makes good communication skills even more difficult is I have found that the english language is lacking when it comes to words to describe human situations/emotions. It's much to cumbersome to describe much of what we feel. (And when you're communicating with a guy, if the conversation is too long/complicated, trust me, they glaze over.)

If there's one thing I can say for sure is the difficult discussions are the ones that are the most important ones to have. I used to fear them and put them off or never have them, but I have come to welcome them as they are the ones that lead to resolution. However, timing makes a huge difference, but it's far better to have a difficult discussion at a bad time than to never have it at all.

Good luck, Monkey! Hang in there. We're all rootin' for you!

[MonkeyGirl18]

I mean, I know he means well, and I understand his side of things. He's told me.

But people can be under so much pressure before they start to crack and he's just very pressuring.

Especially when it comes to school work.

The more he asks the stupid question of if I have homework, the more pressured I feel which causes a big freaking chain that ends with me not being able to handle the pressure and not have the drive to do the work to an extent it's painful.

Like, yeah, I know you're upset, but don't freakin threaten to kick me out because of mistakes I make. Maybe try to read the situation and think "maybe there's something more than she's letting on" because like hell I'm going to say "Oh, I've been feeling so stressed out and anxious."

I've said that before and he didn't really do anything to help me deal with the problems. Once he even says I don't know what stress is. Like, if I wasn't stressed out, then what the fuck am I experiencing?

Now, I'm just ranting on a tangent and I need to stop.

[Lemon Cheesecake]

how about your Mom? Can you talk openly with her? Does she understand about stress?

[MonkeyGirl18]

Yeah, I've even talked to her about how I feel like I need to see a psychiatrist and she agrees. It just needs to come down to talking to my dad about it.

(because they can do more than just counselling. They can prescribe anything if I am in the need for it which I feel like I would probably need a prescription because I can't do this out of pure free will)

[Lemon Cheesecake]

well, again, you are over 21 and legally do not need to have the parent permission or allow them to see your records - regardless if you are on their health insurance. However, it wouldn't hurt to call the helath insurance to find out what your coverage is. Get the phone number off of one of the explanation of benifits you've received in the past or off the insurance card. Your parents should have gotten a card for you and Bassy to have, especially when living away from home. It doesn't cost anything extra.If you don't know how, then ask your Mom to request it for you from the insurance.

You can make the appointments and go. Maybe your parents would also see that as you showing independence. But if you are afraid to go by yourself then ask your Mom or your sister to go with you (do you have any older siblings or are you the oldest?).