Flowershop AU Friendship mdom x EVE

[mdom]

So sad that life can't accept some people just don't drink. Like I never drank alcohol and to some that's so weird. He can blame it on uhhh antibiotics xDDD for what, I don't know.

Except nazis. I want to punch them unapologetically. Including my dad |D

I get it because I am paranoid myself and I have to calm myself down every time. Like, to go outside even it's been a major work because people are not looking at me. Are they??? I guess not. They're not!!! They're not.

[EVE]

he ended up drinking anyway
so much for that resolve. I was so angry at the end of the night. people are constant disappointments
it also reignited my insecurity about not drinking. I don't fit in with anyone. no one ever wants to be my friend because I'm no fun. I don't drink and I'm not good at trivia. I'm useless. my team came in dead last place. we won none of the activities we did before trivia. we also did poorly at trivia. but we were mathematically eliminated after the first 5 activities anyway so it's not like winning trivia could've helped us. why do I even go to events. I always end up feeling like I don't belong.
I wanted to spend time with our team leader because ever since she became team leader she's been busy and in another classroom and I used to talk to her the most. I miss her presence a lot. but she wasn't on my team and our teams sat far apart during trivia. and then during dinner after trivia, she wasn't around when I was looking for her to sit next to because she was outside smoking. she was on the team with the guy and they were actually on the overall winning team. she didn't even stop him from drinking. not that it was her job to. not that it was my job to either. but I'm the only person who cares evidently. I'm the one looking like an insane little shit. team leader even mentioned to me when she saw that I was angry that he said that I'd be mad. so they talked about it. and mocked me for my future reaction. fuck them

I woke up early today to shower because we'd planned to go to the zoo with another coworker, but it was raining so they said rain check. but of course I was already up and showered by the time I saw that message. disappointments all around. I wish I could evaporate

is your dad a nazi

obviously whatever calm I've worked for is not with me today and I'm full on ready to quit my job for irrational reasons that won't hurt anyone but me

[mdom]

Hey, you're fun! They are the ones who aren't fun. I bet there was no biology trivia or anything useful that you're good at. Like kpop from years ago!! Or avatar sites.
Also yes, fuck them. People are indeed disapointments. They treat situations like that lightly and then they'll be like 'oh, poor him, can't quit drinking' as if they couldn't have helped earlier.
The zoo thing was sad but since you were kinda ready you could've gone somewhere else alone. Like sightseeing in the rain to tell me what else is typically Korean |D i'm waiting on your list.

My dad legit thinks asians are some sort of superior race and that mixed races are inferior even though biologically it's the opposite, mixed races are stronger. It's infuriating. He's old now, but like. years ago it made me really mad.

NO DON'T QUIT. Sounds silly but taking deep breaths does help. And also imagining yourself punching every single one of them. People. Bunch of bastards.

[EVE]

there was actually one biology question that I didn't know. and there was one question asking to identify 3 popular Kpop groups and I didn't know
he's not even trying to QUIT drinking. he just wanted to be on a 30 day streak. temporary quitting. like whatever. I am the only one disappointed. and I shouldn't be. it's not me. he's not my problem. he was the one who said he'd be disappointed in himself if he did, but I guess he didn't mean it
work yesterday was shit. I made it bad for myself. I didn't talk to people and just let myself be moody. which is dumb because it's giving them power over me
I should go places alone, but I don't have the motivation

oh that's crazy. mixed races are always stronger. purebred dogs are the best example lol

deep breaths helps when I want them to or when I'm doing them, but then the rest of the time I'm choosing to be upset. or I'm indulging the part of me that is upset and letting it be everything

[mdom]

whyy are they asking things you don't know
could've asked about bones!! the scavenger hunt question that made me watch the series!!

ok knowing is the first part in letting go. You know now next time it won't be that way. Also they don't deserve you!! My precious cinnamon bun E. I'm this close to kicking all of their asses in South Korea!!

I'll motivate you to go out. Your instagram needs more pictures!!!

[EVE]

lol well I don't know most things. the categories were music, korea and general. I literally know nothing about music or korea. hahahahahahah
bones. so sad that it ended

I know that I'm being crazy ughh. like I want to let it go, but I don't
yesterday was actually much better at work since I let it be. I mean it still doesn't feel right because I don't want to be nice to them, but it's smoother if I am. it's like treating them nicely means I consent to their treatment of me. but if I don't treat them nicely, then it's shit for me as well and I look like the unreasonable one. lose lose
I walked to work and saw the guy was ahead of me the whole time. I ended up catching up to him at the last intersection and I didn't talk to him but he talked to me and asked if I was mad the day before lol. he also returned the book I lent him. I told him I may need to quit. we didn't talk about it after that because actually at work. but we were in the office all day together since we're on a weird schedule right now. talked to him about the lesson we had to work on together. was pretty distracted all day. spoke a lot to the other coworker who sits next to me. went into some rabbit hole about movies.
we all walked and had dinner together after work. I am still mad at team leader, but I shouldn't be. I dunno. I feel mad though. I didn't talk to her at dinner really. after dinner she and the two guy coworkers went off to sit more and drink. I didn't go sit with them. it's like she likes hanging out with them more than she does with me anyway

today I watched The Lobster which was one of the movies I talked about with the coworker yesterday. it was strange. have you seen it?

I still need to do productive things, but starting to watch The Dressmaker now

[mdom]

xDD you need better categories. But also some places do hard stuff. Like I watched all seasons of RuPaul's Drag Race. But I was reading about trivia some bars did of drag race, and they had stuff like, playing a bit of a song then ask who was singing and which two queens were in the bottom 2 using that song to lip-synch and I'm like. What. It's been way too many episodes and lip-synch songs!!!

Treating them nicely only means you don't get stressed/get less stressed. Team leader sounds like the loser in this situation. She'll miss you, and if she doesn't, she's WRONG.

oooh I want to watch the Lobster especially because it's strange. But I haven't yet.

[EVE]

lol well one of the company people made this trivia specifically for this event. it wasn't like some kind of other place's trivia night that we crashed or anything. yeah trivia is not my thing. it just makes me feel out of place

yes I'm trying to be kind to all people at all times. it's the new way of life lmao. I feel like I need code names for all these people so it's easier to talk about them hahahaha. you should make them up

watch the lobster so we can talk about how weird it is hahaha
I also watched Silver Linings Playbook yesterday. that was probably a mistake. too easy to project my situation into it |D

[mdom]

Hm alcoholic guy we can still call Dinner dude, like he originally was. Or we can call him 12 steps |D
team leader is uh team leader. Or Gym Leader is a better name.

hmm is the lobster on netflix? I should look for it.
Oooh right. Who would you be? Brad Cooper or J.Law? xD

[EVE]

lol I wouldn't say he's an alcoholic but idk. 12 steps seems more cryptic
we need cryptic names hahahaha
there are 12 people working at this branch so more names |D

yeah the coworker said it was on Netflix. I just streamed it off a site though lol
JLaw obviously. since the guy wants to be with/is actually with the original girl. she's back in korea now to visit him. well she had planned to be here for the week of his birthday to show her dedication to wanting to be with him or something before things blew up. and now that he's back to wanting her, I guess things just went as planned. because I never heard about a resolution to the extended ticket situation

[mdom]

But I don't know about the other 10 xDD
I mean there was the first dude, the one with the cat and that you shouldn't have texted. We can call him Texting Cat.

Where is she from? And him? Y'all are in a weird situation in regards to dating. Nooo it's not in Netflix Brazil! I'm going to have to stream it too heheh

[EVE]

hahaha okay there are 4 girls (including me) and 4 guys in the office room
then there's our team leader in the classroom next to us
and then 3 other teachers that we hardly see because they have their own classrooms too. one of those three teachers was our previous team leader
texting cat is good haha.

they're from South Africa. it's weird. I need to let it go but I'm like poor child are you ok??? because I can't know anything about how he's doing anymore
isle of dogs has also been recommended to me so I may be trying to watch that next haha

[mdom]

oh so the outside teachers are the team leaders and they cycle the job? xD You guys should know them more, wait, the opposite xD they should know you more if they're leading you.

You can know from others! What happened to asking to a third party!!
Isle of dogs looks cute but I don't know, it's a white man movie done in Japan. why

[EVE]

well it's just usually the high level special class teacher is also the team leader, but not always. and if you're teaching the special class, you get your own classroom.

ughhh it's too weird. I don't know who he'd tell haha
yeah the same coworker recommended it who told me about the lobster lol. he's the strange movie person or interesting person overall. he talks easily to everyone I think

[mdom]

What is the special class? Is there a special needs classroom?

Try with someone who'd tell you ahaha and who wouldn't tell him you're the one asking!! oooh strange movie person. Let's call that one IMDB.